Friday, November 27, 2009

5 "F" Words for Success

This week Christians start their New Year in the Church!
Join me in preparing for a fresh start.

Take honest stock of who we are. Write down goals!

I don't know everything or even do what I know.
So instead of being afraid of failure, we embrace it!

In fact, the first motto of this mission was: Fail Faster.
We're going to mess up. Why not do it sooner?
... and get over it and learn to succeed.

Martin Luther sparked this with: 'SIN BOLDLY...
and trust even more boldly in the grace of God.'

Below is a version of a tidbit Rick Warren sent that explains
why we'd rather... Fail Faster than Fear Failure.


Peter and Paul may be the greatest founders of our faith,
besides Jesus and John the Baptist.
And in Phillipians 3:12-13, Paul shows some secrets to success.

1. Face your Faults. Face Facts.
'I don't claim to be perfect.'

Even as a man who wrote much of the Bible and
started churches acriss the Roman empire,
Paul still said he had room to grow.

Sometimes your best friend will point out faults.
Sometimes your best enemy will. Thank God for them both!

2. Forget the Past
'This one thing I do: forget what is behind.'

Leaders learn from mistakes, but they don't live in them.
Let go of hurts, habits and hang ups that hold you back.
And they don't sit on their past success!

3. Focus on the Future
'Straining toward what is ahead, I press on for the goal.'

We aren't ignoring the past... we're looking ahead!
Rivers get their power by being focusing on flowing foward.
Rivers of Life is not called to be Dead Sea or swamp.

4. Fight to the Finish
'I press on!'

Nothing great happens without effort. We coast downhill.
Ordinary people are extraordinary when they don't quit!
Go the extra mile. Never give up.

5. Faith

Faith is the substance of things hoped for,
the evidence of things not yet seen.

Write down what you are trusting God to do.
And then press for that goal!

Monday, November 16, 2009

Family Gathering

It's that time of year again - the planning season. You know, it's here when the air becomes cool and crisp and the leaves are mostly gone. Then it's time to map out what to do for the holidays.

Some families may do the same thing every year. Everyone knows the routine - where to go, what to bring. But being in the ministry several hundred miles from friends and family is not conducive to this arrangement. So we sit on the phone, calendar in hand. What days are you off? Where will everyone sleep?

This year, the planning season is about a different kind of family gathering. As the new congregation starts to form, I realized that this is part of God's family coming together. It's a joyful thing to meet brothers & sisters in Christ!

We are still trying to figure out how to contact everyone so they won't be left out. And since we haven't talked to them yet, we are making our best approximation for when their calendar might be free. We would like the 'new additions' to the family - the ones that have never seen us all together before - to feel welcome and at home. And of course there are preparations so that there is space for everyone.

With God's help and guidance the plans are coming along. If I weren't here I would expect this new congregation of just a few families to feel fragile at this early stage. But it doesn't. Our foundation is firm. It's going to be an amazing party!

Even so, this is just a preview of the family gathering to come. It's going to be big - not like a Thanksgiving dinner or a birthday party, but a wedding! You see the church is described as Christ's bride as millions and millions of us will gather around God's throne, praising his name, for the ultimate reunion.

I've been to some fantastic celebrations, but I really want to see the shindig that God throws to welcome all his children home.

Don't you?

Friday, November 13, 2009

How to Help

When friends or family lose someone they love
or have a dream taken away, they feel pain at the loss.

How can you help? Usually, not by fixing it... or them.
What most people who hurt say is:
I just want someone to talk to.

Can you do that?

It's not OUR EYES that matter, but THEIRS.
What do they see? What do they feel?

Ask: How is my friend speaking about their loss?
Ask them: What died for you?

Then reflect their answers back. Use their words.
Resist the urge to share a story of your own.
Or to solve the problem of their pain.

You cannot relate.
And even if you can. This is their pain.
Loving is not talking but taking.
Accept what they give.
Accept who they are.

Christians follow Jesus example.
And our Lord did not stand TALL, he got LOW.
He knelt before his friends and washed their feet.
So can we.

We can:
Listen rather than Tell.
Observe more than Act.
Wait before we can Lead.
do nothing and not Leave.

Pay attention to when people say the loss and grief began.
Give them permission to 'Be o.k. where they are.'

There's a great story in Bible called Job.
His friends came and just sat with him
when his entire world fell apart.

And that was enough.
But then they decided his 'time was up.'
He needed to 'get over the grief'
and realize he was 'part of the problem.'

But people are not the problem
and Job's friends should have kept their mouths shut.

So, God had to come down and talk to them.
And tell them to ask Job to pray for them!
Because they had really missed the point
of just being a friend.

Grief and Loss

What you feel tracks with how healthy people grieve.
All loss causes pain. But you know this. Beyond our control.
Behind all we think or do. Before we know it's even there.

The first shocked numbness leaves you breathless.
You can't believe or grasp what really happened.
Or you can and it's just too much.

Then we come into searching, begin yearning.
Who (or what) we lost was a part of us,
even when we didn't really realize it was there.

So we look for what we lost.

Sometimes people hear the voices of those who've died.
They go into the next room to find them. Sometimes
we have an urge to go looking and track them down.

Or I've seen shadows in faces and forms on the street.
Is that him? Was that her? Their posture. Their hair.
That shirt. We're oriented to what we lost. But can't find it.

Then disorientation comes. Letting go begins but our compass
has been set, pointing so long (in our heart, not only our head)
for so long, hard oriented toward our loved one lost...
now we don't know where our soul should go.
Where do we send what we want to love?

Here is a place in our journey with grief
that we're not only lost but don't know where we to go.
What are we living for? Where are we trying to be?

And during all this time, people grieve in a hundred ways.
Sometimes they shop. Sometimes they sleep.
Some cry. Some never do.
All of these are good.

Whatever way we need to grieve in the moment.
And there is no 'time limit' when we should be done.
There is no clock to 'get over' what we're going through.

After about six months, those who care for others, do
by asking questions about where they are, check in.
Is what you're doing helping you grieve?
What would you do without the things you're doing now?
Not judging, just seeing. Where are you? What do you need.

There's no right or wrong. Whatever way we grieve at the time,
we do. But I can tell you that all these also stop.

Even tears and emptiness stop. There is a hope.

There is a point where the 'valley of the shadow of death'
begins to slope upwards, ever so imperceptively,
the canyon walls lower and we even begin to see some light.
Sometimes we look around and suddenly we are out.
This is not a cause to feel guilt but release.

This is the beginning of reorientation and resolution.

Where before we couldn't move or forgot appointments
or how to do things we wanted to do, now we reorganize.
Our thoughts and plans begin facing toward a new goal.

And more importantly for the healing process, though we
never lose contact with memories of a touch of those we love,
we begin to pour our love into new relationships, new things.

We relocate energy from the relationship with one we lost
and direct it to building new relationships. Taking new risks.

New ventures await.

The wounded healer, though is with you through this all.
Jesus, God, has gone through loss and pain... and been with you.
We're not claiming some empty platitude to say: Jesus
is standing by you now.

He is with you and always will be. Wherever you go.
Walking. Waiting. Wondering. With you.

Monday, November 2, 2009

What's a Church (not)?

Someone again asked, "So, where's your church going to be?'

I explained, "For us, Church is the people, not a place.
We'll be all over, doing different things."

"Yeah, but where?"

"All over. We do weekly services in three different places.
We host very unusual activities in several different more."

"But where's your Church going to be?"

"The Church is the people, they come and go. They're on the move!"

"But where's the building?"

"We'll hold the musical and monthly preview services
December through March at Perryville High School.
But we'll move around to different parts of the area,
because people around here travel in seven directions,
and there is no central 'there' where people work and play."

"But where will the Church be?"

"The people are the Church and we have to go find them,
moving around to different places to find who God wants
to gather together into the Rivers of Life."

"But where are you going to build your church, a building?"

"The Church is not a building. We're building a people."

80% of the average congregation's time, money and energy
is focused on the building: decorating, buying, heating,
repairing, going to it, talking/worrying/complaining about it.

What if from the very start of a new congregation,
we focused that 80% time, money and energy on people?
Building, training, healing, supporting, encouraging,
firing up, fixing, FOLLOWING, talking/laughing/crying with
People.

God does not fill buildings will His permanent Holy Spirit.
We are the dwelling places of God.
We are Christ's body.
We are Church.